Time for some self reflection!
Have you ever looked around at your friend group, maybe at your co-workers, or really any group of people you interact with, and think why does everyone around me have so many problems? Of course you do, you’re just as human as the next guy, and I am that “Next Guy”. Well lately I have been thinking this way. “It seems as though everyone else is having problems, I can see your issues from ten miles away, and not only can I see them, it’s easy when your life is as perfect as mine to see the issues in others.” Now maybe that’s a bit extreme, my thoughts aren’t always that harsh. But the truth still stands, I do think this way from time to time.
I was once told a story of a man who joined a church. This man was always seeing issues in everyone, now I’m not sure if this story is fiction or not but it’ll help me make my point either way. This man was, as he did regularly, complaining to one of the older men in his church about the issues he saw in everyone else at the church. This older man, being as wise as he was, said to this guy “If you wear yellow glasses, then complain that everything is yellow all the time, maybe it is time to take off the glasses.” Basically if everyone seems to have a problem, maybe they aren’t the problem, maybe you are the problem.
Now I don’t know if that story hit you as hard as it hit me. But over the last few weeks I have been thinking about this idea. Maybe the reason I am seeing the bad in everyone else is that I am wearing my “Bad” colored glasses. There is a vast amount of good that these people do all the time. Sure, they have issues. But the thing I need to remember is that I have issues as well and when I am looking at other peoples lives I need to be fair about how I look at them. When we look into other peoples lives we need to think if we are doing this to see the bad or are we trying to be fair. Are we looking for something we can complain about, or are we looking to see if we can help the person.
To be clear, what I am not saying is that if we see an issue with someone we should keep it to ourselves. Some times people do dumb things that may bring harm on themselves, or have issues they might not even be aware of. I would consider you a bad friend if you saw a major issue with my life and just let it slide because you were to afraid to tell me. Sure, if you see something in my life and you tell me it might hurt and I might be offended, but in the long run I think it would be for the best.
The hard part is determining what issues are considered major and which ones are maybe just personality conflicts or not going to hurt the person in the long term. For this I would suggest the Bible, it is a great source on figuring out what choices could bring someone to ruin. Now when you do bring something to your friend, you need to be careful how you do it. The Bible also covers this topic. You need tell them what they need to hear, but be as loving about it as you can. Jesus is was perfect example of that, He never pulled any punches, but everything He said was always done in a loving way. If you happen to be on the receiving end and someone is telling you something that is hard to hear, don’t completely push them away. Even if what they tells you hurts, at least think about what they are saying and work out if there is any truth to it.
Anyways, I am going to start rambling if I continue. So I will leave you with these two thoughts:
- Take off your yellow colored glasses.
- Remember grace and truth.